Topic: She'd kill me

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Posted at April 29, 2015, 3:21 pm:

This is a song that I wrote a couple of days ago, but i've only just finished cleaning it up. It's a bit of a cliche but i like it and i though i'd post it.

I guess I wasn’t what you wanted me to be
But it’s hard to think like that when you’re seventeen
I need time to grow so lend me a watch
I’ll be ready when you’re far far away

The silence was loudest when we first spoke
My mind was empty of what things provoke
Without the blink of an eye i think we both clicked
Into something that felt alright

If it wasn't for you I'd still be stuck in a rut
waiting to find my perfect slut
You changed my world and burned some bridges
I know that its been hard for you

But now its time to face the truth and admit
Spinning circles can easily colide
And create a shape thats not easy to hide

I don’t know how much I can think about
Its hurting me to speak
I’ve got no words to say to you
I made promises but didn’t follow them through
Growing is everything in this mixed up world
I guess its time to turn my life around


You've still got to wink for me


Comments Cheers

Original of the message was taken from http://www.sputnikmusic.com/forums/

Replies:

I know that its* been hard for you And create a shape thats* not easy ...

Cheers for the indepth crit man.

Overall: Could use some work, but its pretty good.

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